Cute mini-update so people know that I am not, in fact, dead:
Okay, so the branch of the bank I work for is in a grocery store. Kids in the checkout lines are lured by the basket of lollipops on the counter. Yesterday a little boy somewhere in the neighborhood of five stands at my window on tippy-toes and reeeeaches up to me, holding two pennies, and asks me if I can turn them into a dollar bill.
Damn, but I wish I could pull a trick like that. Wouldn't need to be working, would I?